Life stories are never, ever dull. They are all filled with highs and lows and twists and turns.
My story is more like a roller coaster in the dark. I had better hang on because I can’t see which direction it’s going to go next!
The purpose of The Wandering Journey was for personal accountability and to serve as a cathartic reminder to myself of what I am walking away from. As I have written, I have felt myself standing taller and getting stronger as I become a less and less afraid. I have been able to speak out about difficult and very personal subjects. Although I have been intentionally vague with the details…the details aren’t important; the movement forward is.
At this moment, I have been challenged. Seriously challenged…to the point of having to write under a pseudonym and rename my blog. If you are reading this, I have privately messaged you informing you where my content has been moved or you were following the old blog. Thank you for reading.
I’ll say only one thing about the change. Domestic abuse is real and it is all about control.
The new name. Loella Reina. It’s kind of weird, right?
Here’s the history:
If you had asked me how I viewed myself on February 10, 2019, I would have said that I was a middle-aged, uncertain, little bit afraid, woman who didn’t have a clue what she was going to do. A lot has happened in 7 weeks time.
I am no longer the uncertain and afraid woman. I now believe that my voice is important…it’s not the kind of voice that needs to be heard by everyone, but it is the kind of voice that needs to be used to encourage other women to step away from fearful living. It is the kind of voice that needs to be heard by anxious teenagers. It is the kind of voice that needs to be used to comfort others.
It is not an overly loud or recognized voice. It is a gentle voice that says, “Come on, you can do this. Trust yourself. Trust God. You are going to make it through. Yes, it’s hard; really, really hard. But there are people willing and ready to help you.”
Loella means warrior. Although I have never seen myself as a warrior, I have always felt a significant need to stand up for those who need assistance. I have found that my desire to champion others has grown significantly as my life circumstances have changed.
Reina means queen. This one sounds a bit entitled…bear with me as I explain. The thought behind this is that I would love to model my life after Queen Esther, the incredible woman who risked her life for the sake of others. Her story is one of remarkable courage. I long to live as she did…as a woman who once felt rejected, but found the strength to go and boldly request favor for those whose lives were not valued.
So here I go…blogging part 2.